Dear Mr. Vinegar,


Caking is when things lump or stick together, you would avoid caking if you wanted something to flow freely eg salt.


We hope this has helped with your enquiries, if you have any further queries please do not hesitate to contact us.


Yours &c.




I am greatly unimpressed by the mechanically tossed-off tone produced by the lack of detail, and wanky syntax and punctuation, in this response. Since it was written, or at least signed off by, a marketing officer, and the average marketing officer (Iíve met a few) has an IQ of nine and a relevant knowledge base of zero, she would presumably have had to ask one of the R&D monkeys what caking was and why it must be avoided. I know R&D monkeys well (I used to be one), and she ought to have had a textbookful of related technical information to furnish me with.


Must try harder.